Never memories

remember in June 2017
when you passed the exam
i couldn't wait to know the results

(but it turned out you were not even looking forward to me knowing the results)

because i thought it was important for you and that it is important that i also take pride in your success.

the website where the list of passers are published updates at least at mid morning, so noon was the best time to checked.
your name was not hard to find because it's within the first the first letters of the alphabet.
so immediately, i sent you a message. (if that message could bleed excitement your phone would be smothered in it.)

(but too late, it turned out to be a stupid, desperate-for-attention move.)

You informed me that my news is nothing but stale and your gave a flat reply, apparently forced.

"Yeah, I knew. Dolly already called me about it early today."

the reply was heavy with annoyance, impatience, irritation. like questioning my right to care about the news.
reading between the tone of displeasure, i told myself, it must be a wrong time to send the message. you were busy with work saving the city, making your name known; work that would lead to sure success, with your names plastered all over the city bulletin.

it hit me suddenly, that i was intruding in some private celebration that only you and your colleagues and friends should indulge in. I shouldn't have eavesdropped.

i'm sorry i had to intrude.

i'm even sorrier to have sent that congratulatory text. i was not even invited to be part of the congratulating clique.

how presumptuous of me.

and the rest of the afternoon fell silent without any messages from you, because what else is there to expect.
came dinner time and i needed a headcount, so i had to ask: "Are you coming home for dinner."

to which you flatly replied again, obviously crossed for being interrupted, to not wait up because you will be out the whole night celebrating your passing the exam with your friends because

"It's tradition to celebrate within our circle when somebody passes the exam,"

which is a new, novel thing to you: participating in traditions because our family never had any traditions to begin with. nobody bothered to start it. and if the elders had any, you hated them. so to be part of this radical tradition must be something very meaningful to you; to be finally part of a set of exceedingly intellectual, visionary, omnipotent, ever-supportive, vastly influential circle of known professionals. something i could never offer no matter how hard i would try.

that's comforting to know.
that you would rather make memories with your highly revered, intelligent, creative, wonderful, successful friends.
that with me, you would only want to make babies,
but never memories, Tatay,
never memories.

Walks

I walk. walked.

                    Create Routes
                    or Search for a route
                    from millions at MapMyFitness
               

go back home and write a fucking book

i should just go back to my hometown, in the farm.
build myself a fucking cabin
and write the fucking book.

and die without anyone knowing i even happened.

The participatory process as means to art-making

On 21st October 2017 I participated in the second installment of the art-writing workshops organized by VIVA Excon. It was facilitated by Ms. Lisa Ito, currently with the UP Diliman CFA and teaching art history and theory. Our groups was a good mix of artists, writers, and professionals from the field health and medicine (one was an ophthalmologist, another a nurse). 

The workshop part had us attending a "re-enacted" version of the opening of the Sugidanon Ta, Hampang Ta exhibit of the Fine Arts department of the University of San Agustin. From there, we were supposed to write about it -- we were not given a specific "style" to writing art (review, feature article, etc), and I came up with something more academic than expected. But this exercise is quite inspiring to the point that I've made further research on the matter and is planning to make a full blown paper for this. 

here is the product: 

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The participatory process as means to art-making

“Sigudanon ‘Ta, Hampang ‘Ta” is an “attempt to adapt the concept of combining verbal literature and visual narratives,” according to the project description. The material was based on Dr. Alicia Magos’ published research on the Panay Bukidnon’s oral literature, the Suguidanon. This project was USA-FA’s initiative to infuse a research-based art practice and potentially establishing the FA students and faculty’s roles as scholars ‘by conducting researches along with collaborators.” For this project, I am assuming that the collaborators consist of the community of IPs who owns this intangible heritage, and the experts (in the name of Dr. Alice Magos) from where the materials were largely based on. Additionally, the information says that “the project discusses the critical aspect of Panay Bukidnon’s community life that offers insight in the heritage of Panayanon heartlands…and that it will explore the contemporary ideas with tradition and culture, transforming the intangible custom into intangible works of art.”

Thirteen artists produced collaborative works of seven 5 x 4 feet paintings, giving life to the seven multi-layered world of Suguidanon. Each artwork was meant be an independent visual narrative with themes reflecting the richness of the culture and tradition of the Panay Bukidnons. Each of the seven canvas were the artists’ own rendition of what they imagined the characters and the settings would have looked like. It is unclear as to how far they are allowed to produce their own rendition or if they were required to constantly consult with the experts in the process.

During the artists talk, one of the project proponents mentioned that the artists’ depiction of the characters were subjected to validation. Dr. Magos was invited to the opening and was particularly asked to critic each of the pieces. Dr. Magos’ comments mostly focused on the anachronism and cultural misrepresentation. In particular, the “costume” of Paiburong (and his brother) was more Southern Philippines than Panay Bukidnon; Bulawanon’s daughters were not supposed to have “bangs” (or any contemporary hairstyle for that matter) considering the period they are in; or that Makabagting’s nose ring was more African than Filipino. Much of these could have been prevented if the artists employed the participatory process from the project inception up to the production of their final work.

Participatory processes are methods commonly used in the field of Planning. Planning, on the other hand, is process which facilitates the achievement of a certain goal or objective. Participatory planning is known to be one of the more effective methods or processes of planning. In this particular case, representation and participation of the different sectors, fields and expertise forms an integral part of the process. Representation is imperative because planners usually deal with projects that are meant to serve the public, and what better way to ensure that projects are responsive to the public’s needs than to include the public in the planning process. It often goes by the name citizen participation, community participation, public involvement, etc., and it is meant to provide private groups or individuals an avenue to influence public decisions. It has been considered an important part of a democratic decision-making process. In cases where an IP community has a special stake in a certain project, employment of this process is all the more essential.

This is not to confuse participatory processes in art-making with participatory art, where although participation of the audience is necessary, such participation happens only at the end, when the piece of work is finally viewed by the public. Participatory process in a making of a project (i.e. art involving a community) requires engagement of stakeholders from the inception until the time the output or artwork is finally opened to the public.

“Sugidanon ‘Ta, Hampang ‘Ta,” project takes an already existing “body of work”, and translates it into another form that is more accessible for public consumption. I believe that in translation, it is important that the meanings are not lost during the process. Therefore more effort could have been devoted in what in planning process would be called analysis phase -- researching, profiling, and environmental scoping. This phase helps the proponent get the feel of the project he is working on. The analysis phase is where the engagement with the community would have begun, including engagement with the experts and analysis of the readings (secondary data), which are essential in coming up with the “alternatives” for what material, form, and style, etc., to produce. This does not benefit the proponent alone as participatory research enhances also the people’s/IP community’s awareness of their rights and strengthen their role in the mass production of their intangible heritage.

The outputs can be viewed two ways: as a final product where the artists failed to use to his advantage the methods of scoping and profiling to better equip himself with ideas, and use these ideas to develop the project that is the canvass; or we can view it as that the exhibition is not the end but a phase of the design process, where the initial draft of the output is presented and openly critiqued by everyone – experts, IP members, art enthusiasts, cultural workers, etc. during the exhibition, and the iterative process is employed to come up with a more coherent final output. However, considering that the monitoring component of the planning process is not at work here, it seems best to assume that we are dealing with the former. This is not to discount the efforts of the artists and the faculty, after all community projects, even planning itself, is a never-ending work in progress.

jerilee cameña

22 October 2017

References:

Dawn Chatty, Stephan Baas, Anja Fleig. 2003. Participatory Processes towards Co-Management of Natural Resources in Pastoral Areas of the Middle East. . Available online via UN-FAO: http://www.fao.org/docrep/006/ad424e/ad424e03.htm

Tikare, S., et al. 2001. Organizing Participatory Processes in the PRSP. Available online: http://siteresources.worldbank.org/INTPCENG/1143240-1116506251485/20508873/Organizing+Partcipatory+Processes.pdf

Parker, Bob. 2002. Planning Analysis: The Theory of Citizen Participation. http://pages.uoregon.edu/rgp/PPPM613/class10theory.htm

Change the World. 2005. Participatory Processes Methods. Website: http://world-changers.org/participatory-process-methods#guidelines

if/when

When the laundry basket has been emptied
And all the clothes, linens have been folded;
When dinner's done and the table has been set;
When the floor's been swept and mopped clean
(spic and span, so clean and clear u can see your sad face's reflection from there);
When the school work is done and notes scanned;
The kids sleeping soundly in their neat beds;

I will kill myself.