so i said lists are cost-effective tools that can ultimately change your life for the better or for something worse-R--but mostly for the better unless you're afflicted with OCD and you continually obsess over the #4 that you failed to make to happen but then that is not my problem anymore. it's time you saw a shrink, i guess.
this is generally how my desktop stickies look like. these are my work lists. my daily things-to-do. that pay. I have a separate list for things-to-do-that-do-not-pay, and for things-to-do/buy-to-burn-all-the-money-i-earn-doing-the-list-of-things-to-do-that-pay. those buying lists are normally handwritten, haphazardly/impulsively and immediately thrown away to the land of forget-it-even-happened after it has been done, so i could get rid of the guilt ASAP.
since we were on the topic of buying, I would like to explain that i am not a shopper. i usually do not shop for my things. my mother does it for me--if she remembers so. So if i needed clothes or shoes or stuffs for very important things (read: work) i just dig into her closet and pay her for whatever's worth her things that I just declared mine. that's how our mother relationship works.
the buying part i am good at though is grocery shopping. i love shopping for food although this sort of belies me because i remain skinny as hell (but no, never underweight), despite the fact that I am practically an emotional grocery shopper. but it wasn't really like that. when i was poor I never went grocery shopping. I wait for my mother to bring me food from our plantation back in the mountains and that's what i fed my kid. if no food come then no eating was done. but that's like a long time ago. i am my own person now meaning i buy my own food and i have the purchasing capacity powerful enough to buy food from the imported canned goods section and not feel guilty about it (except for the poor local farmers whose produce i practically leave to rot for every can of non-local stuff i buy).
i like to buy "fresh" milk. pasteurized milk here is expensive. i mean, when i was poor i didn't buy them because i couldn't make them last for a month. it's not that i couldn't because in reality, they wouldn't. I bought powdered because i could stretch the shit out of it by super-diluting it with water and by dumping diabetic-inducing volumes of sugar and the thing is good to go. It could give me enough energy to last for a day even if i skipped lunch because i didn't have lunch money. So i now buy pasteurized liquid milk, because i now have more than just lunch money. these cartons of liquid milk only last like five days, max. however, while consuming so much of it, i wasn't aware that there is such a thing as adult lactose intolerance. but there is and that's what i've been starting to have since i've consumed these liquid GMOs. so i can't drink it anymore unless i super need it for my constipation. but i still buy it because i like buying milk. i could actually take it off my list but i couldn't. the temptation is just too hard to handle.
i also like to buy sausages with weird names, mostly words i can barely pronounce. they are also expensive. i can like buy 10-years worth of poor people's food with just 10 kilos of those unpronounceable sausages. but i like to buy them and i like to eat them. but i can not really eat them. i mean, i can eat them and forget about the results of my blood work. or i can just feed them to my children since they still have three decades ahead of them before they start worrying about blood work and shits. Actually they are never included in my list, at least not all the time, because there's no need to. i go on auto-pilot when i pass by the sausage freezer and then they just surprise me when i get home. (oh no, did i sleepwalk again to the frozen food section?)
and cheese. also expensive, even the run-of-the-mill mass-produced ones because basic filipino meals do not include italian cheeses so understandably, spending like 2-kilos-worth-of-fish on cheese for no reason (so just you could eat a french baguette margherita in the morning because just so) is just irresponsible. but my children love baguette margherita. but also, i am not supposed to keep on eating cheese. i once consumed a packet of grated parmesan while passing time looking after my sleeping infant child, the second of the 10 dozens infant children i am looking after. it's almost tragic. so, i am an emotional-parmesan-consumer kind of person. i have no life.
so by now you would know that what i am saying is, the capacity of the person to pay for things she wants to eat (possibly) increases as she gets older but the possibility of her actually consuming those things will continue to decrease as she ages. that's the saddest fact i just learned, experience-wise. So if i grocery-shop by my age, i shouldn't even be shopping in the big grocery stores. i should just start my own garden and harvest want i SHOULD be eating, the cost of it is nil. unless you find compulsion to buy your lot to do your hipster urban gardening. but that's another story.
sheesh.
i don't even know why i am talking about food. i'm not even a food blogger.
FIN.
No comments:
Post a Comment